I was recently thinking about a boy from my second grade class -- not my child's class, mine. I remember how he was always in trouble. I also remember how he was so full of energy, had a nice smile and a great sense of humor.
I also remember the teacher had zero patience with him. In fact, one day the teacher chose me to escort him to the principal's office because once again he had done something to annoy her (I can't recall what at this point). We raced all the way there and I thought, he's actually fun!
He was labeled a trouble-maker. I think he was probably smart, bored, full of great ideas that no one bothered to listen to, and...here's the kicker...wasn't like the teacher and, more importantly, wasn't who the teacher wanted him to be.
At the end of the day, this child wasn't a trouble-maker -- he was different and that annoyed the you-know-what out of the teacher. Why? Because it's what many see as more work. Admittedly, as school budgets are cut and classroom sizes increase, teachers have their hands full, but at what point do we realize that trying to fit every child into the same mold is not the answer -- it's a problem.
In far too many cases, I see the same sentiment with parents. Be like me because otherwise you're causing me work and stress: the high-spirited child exhausts; the argumentative child requires lengthy explanations; the easily distracted child requires patience, and the creative, whimsical child who {insert cliche here} "marches to the beat of a different drum," at times, frustrates.
Parents have been conditioned to think something is wrong with their child if they don't fit "the mold."
The boy in my second grade class was all these things: high-spirited, argumentative, distracted, and whimsical. Was he more work for the teacher? Once could argue yes. However, just think how things could have been different if instead of looking at him as a problem, she sought ways to celebrate and encourage who he was. I know, hindsight is everything, but at what point do we start learning from past mistakes? These many years later, I still see kids being treated the same exact way as the boy in my second grade class.
"Imagination is more important than knowledge." - Albert Einstein
Einstein had it right. However, in the age of standardized tests, over-scheduled kids, and dinners on the go, imagination has taken a back seat.
In a climate of "be like me because being yourself is a lot of work for me" there's little room for imagination. That's why day-dreaming, doodling, questioning, wondering, hoping, inventing, and pretending does not fit within the mold -- after all, there's only so much room.
Breaking the mold.
We used to think that marching to the same drum was the right thing to do. There was comfort inside the mold. Predictability. No ruffling of feathers (I know, another cliche :)
However, once we decided what we really wanted for OUR family and got the courage to ACT, the mold slowly began to break. Today, my family day-dreams, doodles, questions, wonders, hopes, invents, and pretends.
The only molds around here are for cookies.
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